Home with the Kids Newsletter April 12, 2005

The Editor's Desk - From Beneath the Clutter
Feature Article - Is Your Family Really Benefiting When You Work at Home?
What's happening on the discussion boards?
Guest Article - "Stranger Danger" revisited: Concentrate on situations and actions!
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The Editor's Desk - From Beneath the Clutter

I had a really good week this past week. We finally got Gage's CT scan scheduled, which is a huge relief, just to get things moving toward his surgery again. A distant cousin from Denmark came to visit over the weekend, and his wife turned out to be an intern and somewhat familiar with scaphocephaly, as her anatomy professor was born with the condition before there was a surgery to fix it. Obviously, aside from what they call a "boat-shaped head", he's fine. She was wonderful to talk to.

We also got our taxes done and are getting a refund. However, business is looking good enough that I'm going to have to start filing quarterly. Ok, so that's really good news, even though it means more work.

All in all, I'm really feeling a lot of relief right now. Things are going fairly smoothly. Now if I can just get a decent amount of sleep!!

Don't forget, you can contribute your articles or tips anytime for consideration. Just use the contact form.

Feature Article

Is Your Family Really Benefiting When You Work at Home?

You’ve beaten the obstacles and found a way to work at home, whether by finding a job or starting a home business. But is your work getting in the way of time with your family? It may be time to make sure you are finding balance between working at home and your family.

Let’s take a look at some easy things you can do to ensure that you are spending time with your family.

Make time for play. Family activities are a great way to relax away from work. It can be as simple as taking a walk or going to the park, or it could be a full day excursion to a museum, amusement part or beach. You don’t have to leave the house, of course. You could play games, make cookies or do other fun activities around the house. The point is to simply have fun as a family and have time to talk to each other.
One way to start is to plan a family night. Tell everyone they have to be home on a particular evening each week and do things as a family. Even if you just rent a movie to watch together, it’s something you’re doing together.
If you’re married, make sure you plan a regular date night with your spouse. Frequency may depend on how old your children are and how often you can get babysitting, but it is important for your marriage to have time as a couple.
You don’t have to spend a lot of money to have fun with your family. Just make time for fun.
Be there for your children’s activities. If your children are involved in sports, acting, singing or other activities, make sure you are there for all the games, performances or other important events. It will help your children to know that they are very important to you.
Set rules and enforce them. If your children understand when they can interrupt your work you will be able to get more done in less time, giving you more time for your family.
Of course, you need to be consistent. If kids get away with breaking the rules some of the time, they will test the rules often. Consistency will save you time in the long run, even if you aren’t sure you want to spare the time at a particular moment.
Pay attention to what kind of attention each child needs. Every child is different. Some demand attention while others are so quiet it’s easy to forget that they need you too. Make sure you spend time with each child as an individual.
When the kids come home from school, take some time to talk about their day. They will appreciate your interest. You should also make sure they understand their homework and start it at whatever time they do best at finishing it. Some do best starting homework immediately on getting home, while others do better if they can play for a while first. Be aware of your child’s needs.
If your work is something the children can help with, let them be involved. If not, you can still at least talk to them about what you do. This sets a good example for your children by helping them to know what working is really about.

It’s easy to get buried in the needs of your work when you work at home. A little bit of planning can go a long way toward making working at home a wonderful experience for all. Your family is why you decided to work at home, so don’t let your time with them get put aside.

Stephanie Foster is the owner of Home with the Kids, a resource that knows that there's more to staying home with your family than just business. For more stay at home tips, visit the site at http://www.homewiththekids.com/ and subscribe to the free newsletter.

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What's happening on the forum?

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Guest Article

"Stranger Danger" revisited: Concentrate on situations and actions!

Children do not understand the concept of "stranger". When you try to explain to them, it is even difficult to explain. Therefore, situations need to be discussed and acted out for young children to understand what to watch out for! It needs to be communicated, that strangers are not necessarily bad, but unknown. You are not being impolite to be cautious with people you don't know, just being SAFE!

1. The child's age is an important consideration:
* Children aged 3-5: They are curious and may be naturally trusting. They also easily respond to adult attempts to be kind and supportive. Toddlers and preschoolers do not necessarily grasp the long-term consequences of potentially dangerous situations. They live in the now, hence the "mine!" attitudes.
* Children aged 6-9: School age children have more of an ability to determine and understand right from wrong. They are able to remember information and put it to practical use. They may still get overwhelmed in challenging situations.
* Children aged 10-13: These children are not good judges of their ability to handle bad situations. They may also feel that they should not be scared in difficult situations and can act too relaxed about their attitudes toward risk.

2. Parent's attitudes and approaches can make the difference. Parents must set the right tone for their children. If parents are calm when discussing tough or scary topics, children will be better able to learn and listen about the possible dangers. Parents must monitor their own fear and be careful not to alarm their children unnecessarily.

3. Deliver information in age appropriate ways. Younger children (toddlers and preschoolers) will get more out of role-playing situations and repeated conversations. Older children (school age) can discuss current events or real situations to continue the safety education process. Teaching our children and learning how they interpret the information is a continual process in order to keep them safe from stranger dangers.

4. Be aware of the specifics strangers use to get to children. Teach children not to help strangers look for lost puppies, accept gifts or candy, or get into a car with someone they do not know.

5. Work with the TASK strategy.
*Talk - reminds me to discuss safety and strangers with my children. I ask them what they think a 'stranger' is, and talk about what they should and should NOT do with strangers.
*Ask - reminds me to ask my kids what they heard. This helps me figure out what they understood and what we need to work on their understanding of.
*Show - is the role playing portion. This really helps younger kids learn how to put their knowledge into practice and really shows me, the parent, if they do have a complete understanding of the important safety practices.
*Know - is the step of making sure your children know who, when where, and how to get help. Do they know their complete names, address, and phone number? Do they know how to dial 911? Do they know who 'friendly' strangers are?

6. Monitor the media. Child abductions and murders are in the news and parents should be aware of what their children are watching or hearing. Help your children separate out fact from fantasy. Changes in sleep, nightmares, and other behaviors may mean additional guidance is necessary, possibly even professional help.

Kathy Alexander, Mother of four, Madison (3), Delaney(2), Courtney(2), and Wyatt(4 mos). She and her husband of 11 years live in Texas with their children. Protect Children! Teach Safety! 4 Kidz 4 Safety 'N More offers child safety products including photo identification, DNA & fingerprinting kits, books, games and charts at 4kidz4safetyNmore.com !

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