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Feature Article - 10 Ways To Ensure a Perfect Playdate
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Phew! My new computer is finally most of the way set up. Not all the way... the printer still isn't attached and I haven't managed to get Windows Media Center to admit that I have a TV signal for it. But I'm getting there.
This new computer is my Christmas present. It was a new computer or a minivan, and things just aren't quite where I'd like them to be to get the minivan. In a few months, though...
We have the new and old computers networked through a router. Haven't figured out file sharing yet between the two machines, but I'm determined to get that eventually. I'd like to remove a lot of files from the old computer, and it would be far simpler to just move them from one to the other through a network if I can figure that out than it would be to burn a stack of CDs.
It was quite a battle getting the router going. The first one just couldn't keep up the internet connection for some reason - I don't know why. After going through two of one model, I decided to buy a different brand. Had trouble with it too, but got the internet connection working again through the old computer, took a break for dinner and came back to find the connection mysteriously working on both machines. Just how these things go sometimes, I suppose. So far it's stayed up, so I'm quite happy.
Are you ready for Christmas? We're pretty ready here. Ariel says she wants all kinds of things, which comes naturally at 3 years of age. She loves music, though, and says she wants a flute like her older cousin plays (yes, a real one!) and a guitar. Well, she's getting a ukelele, since that will fit her hands, and we'll go from there. Definitely want to encourage this interest in music! Gage, at 10 months old is easy - he won't notice how much or how little he gets. we'll just have to watch his wrapping paper and ribbon intake.
Don't forget, you can contribute your articles or tips anytime for consideration. Just use the contact form.
All parents want their children to have friends. Getting together with friends at the park, playing with friends at day care or preschool, or visiting with relatives are part of a preschooler's social life. Also important are going over to a friend's house and inviting them over to play for a playdate. All of these activities facilitate friendships for your toddler or preschooler.
Unfortunately, personalities and play styles may sometimes clash during these get-togethers. However, if you are prepared, you can help these playdates go so much more smoothly. Here are 10 ways to ensure a perfect playdate.
1. Invite a small and even number of children. Inevitably, with an odd number of children, one child will be left out of the fun. Plus, fewer children mean fewer conflicts, so limit your guests to two or four, including your own child.
2. You do not have to babyproof your house completely, but make it as safe as possible and alert parents to potential dangers. Perhaps set aside a designated play area and close the doors to any rooms you do not want children to enter.
3. Put away favorite toys so your child will not have to worry about sharing. Also, put away popular toys if you only have one. For example, if you have only one riding toy, youngsters are likely to fight over it, so put it away until after the playdate. Alternatively, you could ask your guests to bring their own favorite riding toys.
4. Don't expect too much socialization. Most toddlers and preschoolers parallel play, so do not push them to play together. Even when youngsters play side by side, they learn a lot just by watching each other.
5. Intervene in disputes only when necessary and offer alternative plans. When there is a conflict with sharing, let the children work things out on their own unless the situation escalates to violence. In this case, you may need to distract them with other activities, such as blocks, puzzles, or bubbles, so have items like these on hand.
6. Encourage cooperative play with toys such as bubbles, modeling clay, blocks, sand box, or age-appropriate games. Some parents find that starting the playdate with one of these shared activities gets the playdate off to a good start. Definitely do not turn on the television or put on a video! The children are supposed to play during a playdate, not watch television.
7. Offer snacks. This is a great way to calm things down if things start getting out of hand or to liven things up if the kids are bored. You can even include the children in preparation. However, check with the parent first to make sure the snack will not interfere with dinner or to find out about any allergies. If a snack time would interfere with the next meal, at least offer beverages to your guests.
8. Plan for the playdate to last less than two hours. Children will get tired of each other and cranky after about an hour and a half to two hours. It is better to leave the children wanting more than to extend the time and have the playdate end with fights and tears.
9. Give a five-minute warning before leaving. This will give the children time to adjust to leaving.
10. Help pick up toys. Encourage the kids to clean up together so that no one will be left with a mess. Not to mention, this will teach your children cooperation and good manners.
Now that you are prepared for a playdate, invite those little friends over!
Carren W. Joye is the author of "A Stay-at-Home Mom's Complete Guide to Playgroups" (ISBN 0-595-14684-8) and "Homeschooling More Than One Child: A Practical Guide for Families" (ISBN 0-595-34259-0). A homeschooling mom of four children, she has founded four successful playgroups and one homeschool support group. Visit http://www.onlineplaygroup.com for more information about playgroups.
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It's easy to think that any business can be successful if you work hard enough, but there are many situations where this just isn't so. Consultants, coaches, and other service professionals often start a business believing that all they need to do is charge a "reasonable" fee and sell "enough" of their time. But unless you do the math to prove or disprove your assumptions, you may be creating a business that can never succeed. Here's what can happen:
- Impossible Business #1 -
My client Molly was selling her services as an image consultant to individuals who wanted an updated or more professional look. She charged $50 per hour, which she thought was the most anyone would realistically pay to work with her. In most cases, she traveled to a client's home or went shopping with her client.
Including travel time and lunch meant that Molly could only make two appointments in one day. The average appointment was two hours long. So the maximum amount Molly could earn in one day turned out to be $200. But in order to earn that amount five days per week, Molly would have to schedule ten different clients, all of whose schedules were able to adapt to whatever times she had available.
This was hopelessly unrealistic. Even if Molly had been able to make the scheduling work, when would she have had the time to do the marketing required to land that many clients? It turned out that the maximum Molly could really earn using this model was about $500 per week. After paying her taxes, she couldn't even cover her monthly living expenses.
- Impossible Business #2 -
Fred was a student of mine who worked as a software consultant for midsize corporations. He typically charged $75 per hour, and when he landed a contract, it often consisted of 20-100 billable hours.
Because Fred's earning capacity was so high and he disliked marketing, he spent a lot of money on marketing himself indirectly. He purchased display ads in industry journals and directories, mailed expensive brochures to large lists of prospects, paid to exhibit at trade shows, and hired a telemarketer to prospect for him. Fred also worked on contracts that came through agencies, who often took 20-30% of his earnings as their percentage.
Fred was earning as much as $80,000 per year, but he was losing about $10,000 per year in agency commissions, and spending $20,000 per year on marketing. In return for all his hard work, he was earning considerably less than he had at his last job.
- Making the Impossible Possible -
New consultants, coaches, and other professionals almost always overestimate how much they can earn and underestimate the amount of time and money required to successfully market themselves. They also forget that they will have to cover not only their living costs and business expenses, but pay self-employment tax, buy their own health insurance, provide for their own retirement, and allow for unpaid vacation and sick time.
If Molly or Fred had taken the time to sit down with a calculator before starting out in business, they would have quickly discovered that they were on the wrong track. But both of these businesses were able to be rescued.
Molly began selling her time by the day instead of by the hour. She offered her clients a full-day package that consisted of a wardrobe review and consultation in the morning and a shopping trip in the afternoon. By charging $395 per day and scheduling three clients per week, she could earn more than double than she did previously.
She also began offering a monthly one-day image workshop as a way of bringing in more income while giving prospective clients a chance to experience her work. The workshop became her main source of new clients, and marketing the workshop turned out to be easier than marketing her personal services.
Fred learned how to market himself less expensively through networking, speaking, and writing articles. Instead of buying booths at trade shows, he was showcased there as a presenter, and spent time networking with the other attendees. The same publications where he used to run ads now ran his articles. Rather than paying a telemarketer, he started picking up the lunch tab for people he thought could refer him some business.
As a result, his expenses for marketing and commissions dropped from $30,000 per year to $10,000. At the same time, his income rose to $100,000 per year, because as his visibility and reputation grew, his services were more in demand and he could command higher rates.
If earning a decent living as a self-employed professional sometimes seems impossible to you, start asking how it could be possible. What can you change about how you are marketing yourself, how much you are charging, and how you are packaging your services? While it could be that success will come if you just work a little harder, it's more likely that you first need to start working a little differently.
C.J. Hayden is the author of Get Clients NOW! Thousands of business owners and salespeople have used her simple sales and marketing system to double or triple their income. Get a free copy of "Five Secrets to Finding All the Clients You'll Ever Need" at http://www.getclientsnow.com
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