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The Editor's Desk - From Beneath the Clutter
Feature Article - Be Yourself and Persuade Others
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Guest Article - Time Poverty
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Ariel has a new favorite computer game. It's called Microsoft Word.
Yes, really. She thinks it's great to type in her letters and see them on the monitor. Sometimes I change to a large font and add color for her, which she appreciates. I keep the font simple so that I know she is recognizing the letters.
She had a fun day yesterday. We stopped by my mother's work, and one of my mom's coworkers gave her one of those plastic jack-o-lanterns kids use for trick or treating. Suddenly everyone was giving her candy. I think she might be disappointed next time we go there and no one gives her any more.
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Got Family Time!?! |
"Could you take out the trash, please?" "Take out the trash!"
As an at home parent, you've probably said one or both of these many times. They get very different reactions, don't they?
Yes, the second one probably gets faster results but much more resentment. You probably don't use it the first time you ask. Why? Because it's not the best way to ask someone to do something and you already know that.
But it's easy to get tired of asking over and over for a chore to be done. If you can convince your child or spouse to do the job without being asked, isn't that better?
Yes, that is a much more difficult job and you'll still have to ask some or even most times. But if you make sure they understand that it's their part of keeping the house running smoothly, you might have to ask a little less often.
If you run a home business, you probably have to write for your website. You might even dread this task. After all, writing was so hard in college, wasn't it?
Now, convincing the kids to take out the trash may not seem that much like convincing a customer to buy from you. But it can be.
With your children, you have that very personal relationship (not to mention you live with them!), so it's not too hard to take that extra time to explain why something needs to be done most of the time. You tell them why you want the job done, in a way they will understand. Hopefully, you don't talk down to them or over their heads. After all, even your high school student doesn't want you to talk to them as you would one of your old college professors, or even as they would to their teachers. That's not the relationship you have.
Customers appreciate much the same treatment, and it really is not hard to give. Write as though you are talking to them in person. Who is your customer? Why should they buy from you?
Now, whether you are talking or writing, you have to make sure the tone of your words (and voice, if you're talking) is appropriate. Talk or write as you would to your college professor, and your kids won't want to listen or your customers will leave. Talk down and the same thing will happen.
Instead, talk or write for your audience the way they want you to talk or write for them. Have a little fun, if it's appropriate.
Now, all this sounds terribly tedious to learn. Good news, it doesn't have to be!
When you talk, just be yourself. But if you're having trouble getting your family to do things around the house, it might be time to rethink your approach, just as you might have to change your writing style if you run a home business.
Now, many people think writing and persuasion are difficult. They aren't. It just seems that way because throughout school you are told that you need to write this way, this is how you structure a persuasive argument, etc.
What you learned in school has very little to do with real life. If you're having trouble in these areas, it's time to relearn your skills and be natural.
Ok, so being told to be natural isn't enough? You need more guidance? That's fine, most of us do need to be reminded how to relax about these things.
I would like to recommend to you a new, very affordable (about $10) ebook called Make Your Content PRESell! Now, this may sound like it has nothing at all to do with getting your teen to take out the trash, but the principles are sound both for writing and for talking. Yes, the focus is on online business, but it will have you thinking about other ways to use it.
In fact, your teen may enjoy the ebook after you're done with it. After all,
wouldn't they love to be able to persuade you to let them stay out late? So
you'll probably tell them no anyhow, but the skills presented in this ebook
will help you in many ways. If your spouse works outside the home, have them
read it too. It's not just for you, it's for your whole family - at least
if they can read well enough ;).
Stephanie Foster is the owner of Home with the Kids, a resource that knows that there's more to staying home with your family than just business. For more stay at home tips, visit the site at http://www.homewiththekids.com/ and subscribe to the free newsletter.
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There is a misguided thought that being busy is the same as making progress. With shorter deadlines, competing priorities, interruptions and even higher quality expectations, it brings today’s time challenges to another level. Yet the number of hours in the day has not changed.
A common mistake that most people make is not allowing for a balanced life-style. Remember, one’s overall health and wellness require attention to six important life areas:
Physical (exercise, nutrition, sleep)
Intellectual (cultural, aesthetic)
Social (intimate and social relationships)
Emotional (expression of feelings, desires)
Spiritual (quest for meaning)
Career (career goal directed work)
Naturally you don’t need a required amount of activities in each of these areas, but if you neglect one entirely, you may be ignoring an important part of yourself. For example, if you set aside time for exercise you will improve your overall functioning and better manage your stress. If you take time for your intellectual growth, you will gain new perspectives on life, experience different pleasures, and be better able to focus on your goals.
Consider your biological prime time – the time of day when you are at your best. Are you a morning person, a night owl, or a late afternoon whiz? Knowing when your best time is and planning to use that portion of the day for your priorities is effective time management.
You can conquer procrastination using Alan Lakein’s method of “Swiss Cheese”. When avoiding something because you dread the task, break it into smaller bits and do just one of those smaller tasks. If this is not possible, set a timer and work on that biggie for just 15 minutes. By doing a little at a time (I hate filing), eventually you will reach a point where you’ll want to finish it once and for all.
For myself, learning to say “no” was next to impossible. Such a small word, but I wanted to please no matter the cost to me. But focusing on your goals may help. You must be convinced that you and your priorities are more important – that seems to be the hardest part in learning to say “no”. But it does get easier when you simply can’t find the time and refuse to be derailed for that hour or that day.
In the Malaysian culture, only the gods are considered capable of producing anything perfect. Whenever something is finished, a flaw is left on purpose so the gods will not be offended. Of course some things need to be closer to perfect than others but perfectionism can be a form of procrastination. Shed the stress of always being perfect.
Gaining control over your business (and personal) life, means gaining control over your calendar. Eliminate the trivial tasks or those that do not lead to your long-term goals. Focus your efforts where they count. Managing your time requires an understanding of where your time is going, outlining your priorities, and defining a time budget and plan, even if it means changing some behavior and monitoring the results.
© 2004 Esther Smith
Esther Smith publishes a weekly Newsletter, Partners-For-Profit. Her websites: http://thepermanentventure.com and http://moreonlinecash.com offers proven resources for all home businesses. She also does freelancing: writing, editing and/or proofreading. mailto:editor@thepermanentventure.com
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