Last Updated September 15th, 2009

The Putting the Kids to Bed Drinking Game

Some nights getting the kids to bed isn’t easy. They’re bright eyed and bushy tailed when you’re ready for them to get to bed. This has lead to me and my husband joking about a drinking game for getting the kids to bed.

Standard drinking game rules, except you can’t take a drink until the kids are actually asleep.

Child gets up for drink – Take one drink.

Asks for other parent – Take one drink.

Gets up to go potty – Take one drink.

Gets up to go potty but doesn’t do anything there – Take 2 drinks.

Asks for an extra story – Take one drink.

Asks for same story as the night before – Take 2 drinks.

Complains: “I’m too hot!” – Take one drink.

Complains: “I’m too cold!” – Take one drink.

One child is too hot and the other is too cold – Take 2 drinks.

Wants to watch television with you – Take one drink.

The show you’re watching isn’t age appropriate – Take one drink.

The show you’re watching isn’t age appropriate and your child wakes you with nightmares that night – Take 2 drinks.

Mysterious owie appears. It hurts a lot. Needs kisses – Take one drink.

Mysterious owie must, must I say, have a bandage put on it – Take 2 drinks.

Child throws up – Take 2 drinks.

Gets up crying that favorite bedtime toy is missing – Take one drink.

Missing toy is at foot of the bed – Take one drink.

Missing toy is right by pillow, where it had been when you put child to bed – Take 2 drinks.

And of course, kids go to bed with no trouble at all… take a drink if you feel like it. You probably deserve it.

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post may be 'affiliate links.' This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission.

Last Updated August 12th, 2009

What's the Dangerous Part of this Toy?

My mom gave my son a new toy the other day. It’s pretty cute, an inflatable remote control dump truck. He loves it, especially since he can use it in the house and not worry much about bumping into walls.

But one part of it comes with a warning to not let children use it. Care to guess which part?

remotetruck

That’s the truck, remote and foot pump. He’s bumped it into walls enough already that I think it has a small leak somewhere. He doesn’t seem to mind.

So…

Which part is too dangerous for children?

Did you guess:

pump

If so, you’re correct! The foot pump is apparently the most dangerous part of this toy! See?

pumpwarning

If you can’t read that, it says:

Warning:
This is not a toy and must only be operated by an adult. Keep out of reach of children.

I’m sitting here trying to figure out the danger. I don’t think the accordion folds of it could give so much as a nasty pinch. I don’t think fingers could get badly stuck in it.

About the only danger I can see is a kid toppling over while stomping on it. Maybe I’m a mean mom, but I don’t see that as a problem.

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post may be 'affiliate links.' This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission.

Last Updated February 16th, 2009

Maybe They Should Work for NASA

At least that’s what my husband said when I pointed out the conversion error from pounds to kilograms on the diapers his mother bought for us from Walmart. It caught my eye because the Pampers Swaddlers we got from the hospital had a completely different answer, despite the number of pounds they say the diapers are good for being the same.

If you’re having trouble reading it, the Walmart ones say 10 lb or 8 kg while the Swaddlers say 10 lb or 4.5 kg, which is the correct answer.

That said, the Walmart ones really are larger. My tiny little girl just swims in them, while the Swaddlers fit beautifully. But 8 kg is more than 17.5 pounds, and I rather doubt they go that big.

In the long run we’re looking at cloth diapering. Just now Selene is much, much too small for the bumGenius diapers we have on hand, so we’re using disposables until she grows a little more. It should save us a lot of money. Then again, how will I find silly packaging mistakes like this?

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post may be 'affiliate links.' This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission.

Last Updated December 23rd, 2008

'Twas a Few Days Before Christmas – A Mother's Story

Twas a few days before Christmas, and all through the house
The children were running, their usual carouse.
The furniture and floors had been cleaned up with care;
In hopes that somehow no messes they’d bear.

Ornaments were nestled into the tree and spread
In hopes that the children carefully would tread.
The weather to us was a little cold snap
Meaning rain on the window barely did tap.

Then in the living room there arose so much chatter
I left my computer to see what was the matter.
Much as the children might want me to dash
I knew it was just another childhood clash.

The lights on the tree quickly did show
The contested toy that someone did throw.
The mess no surprise that it should appear;
Though my hope for otherwise had been so sincere.

Holiday tempers can flare so very quick
The tension between them soon grew quite thick.
More rapid than usual, the quarrels they came;
With tugging and shouting and calling a name.

“That’s my toy!” “She hit me!” “Well I had it first!”
“No, I did!” “I’m telling!” They stopped with my outburst:
“Out to the back yard, and go have a ball;
Now go and play, go and play, go and play all!”

One look at the rain and outside they did fly;
Thinking of puddles and making mud pie.
So out of the door the children they flew
Barely heeding my insistence on the wearing of shoes.

It would take but a moment, I knew without proof;
That such a decision some would call a goof.
As I opened the window to listen for sound;
They raced all around the cold, muddy ground.

In mud they’d soon be covered from their heads to their foot;
The only question was how long they’d stay put.
The play in the mud was right on its track;
But all too soon they came in, wanting a snack.

Their wishes for food were oh so contrary;
Frozen treats or hot chocolate, and all they could carry.
Their sweet little eyes from play were aglow,
But they insisted their tummies more food they did owe.

Quickly I noted the chattering teeth,
As well as the mud on their shoes just beneath.
A quick decision, the mud or the belly?
Hoping the mud wasn’t sticky as jelly.

So I said, “Come in and clean up yourself”
While I looked for quick snacks up on the shelf.
Muddy feet on clean floors quickly did tread;
But now it was time to get the kids fed.

Not long in their bedrooms the children did lurk;
Eager to see the result of Mom’s work.
Pleased they did seem with the food that I chose;
With snack time they wanted to watch favorite shows.

Playtime wasn’t long enough; they quickly did bristle;
It’s amazing what foods can be used like a missile.
But I heard them exclaim, right before the next fight,
“Mommy, I’m sure ready for Christmas tonight!”

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post may be 'affiliate links.' This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission.

Last Updated June 4th, 2008

I've Been Fighting Malware

Oh I’ve been fighting malware,
All the livelong day!
I’ve been fighting malware,
Trying to make it go away!

Can’t I find the files that were
Infected so early in the morn?
Scanning the computer over
and over and over again!

Scanning, what’d it find,
Scanning, what’d it find,
Scanning, what’d it find for meeee?
Scanning, what’d it find,
Scanning, what’d it find,
Oh come on, let this be it!

Think of this as sung to “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad”. Probably badly too. It’s been a long day and I still don’t know if I’ve got it. Just glad in a way that it’s my husband’s computer rather than mine. I can at least do something semi-productive while waiting for each scan to finish.

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post may be 'affiliate links.' This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission.

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Disclosure: Home with the Kids is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. I also review or mention products for which I may receive compensation from other sources. All opinions are my own.